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Monday, 15 February 2010 02:00

Let's throw a party

By  Ahmed Patel
Avina: Let's throw a party.

Joe: Where?

Avina: Right here in our flat.

Joe: Okay. But who will we invite? And of those, who will actually come?

Avina: I don't know, I'll put out a feeder.

Joe: Don't you mean a feeler?

Avina: You know what I mean. I'll test the waters, so to speak.

Joe: How?

Avina: I'll drop a hint to the people I'm in regular contact with.

Joe: Both of them? Let me guess, you're hoping they'll 'drop hints' to those whom they're in regular contact with and hope they provide you with feedback? Expect to hear your hint - slightly altered - twice after your original transmission. That's if the two of them flicked their 'sense of humour' switches.

Avina: Oh please. Who would you invite?

Joe: I didn't suggest throwing a party.

Avina: You wouldn't suggest it because you don't have anybody to invite and even if you did, you'd be too afraid to invite them.

Joe: Afraid?

Avina: Afraid of rejection.

Joe: That's probably true. But what's wrong with being scared of rejection?

Avina: Oh, there's nothing wrong with being too insecure to throw a party.

Joe: It's an insecurity that doesn't necessarily have to be dealt with urgently.

Avina: I think it does.

Joe: Why, is the party as soon as next weekend?

Avina: Yes, it is. Joe: But you only just thought of throwing a party.

Avina: How do you know?

Joe: By the way you proposed it.

Avina: What if I rehearsed proposing it that way?

Joe: Then either your acting skills have improved or I was disinterested from the word go.

Avina: Have you noticed all the ants around the apartment?

Joe: Yes, I noticed them the minute I set foot in this place when we came to view it with that stupid estate agent.

Avina: I know, the ant situation (as you called it), was the first thing you commented on about the place you eventually agreed to live in.

Joe: Why did you ask me if I noticed the ants if you knew I had noticed them before?

Avina: Because I think your perception of their behaviour has somewhat influenced yours.

Joe: What, I believe I'm an ant or I subconsciously want to be an ant?

Avina: You subconsciously believe you're an ant and you consciously try to be like one.

Joe: So I'm obvious. Is that what you're saying?

Avina: Yes.

Joe: I'd be comfortable as an ant. So blind. So frantically busy.

Avina: Ants can't make that choice.

Joe: So what? I can.

Avina: You can't possibly be an ant then.

Joe: Didn't you learn at school that anything's possible?

Avina: Yes, it was taught but I didn't buy it.

Joe: Why not?

Avina: For obvious reasons.

Joe: If I'm obvious and am not seeing how obvious those reasons are it can't be obvious.

Avina: The word 'probable' makes more sense to me.

Joe: I think one may argue against that using the same 'obvious reasons'.

Avina: What, that believing in the probability that events leading up to situations create circumstances is the same as being skeptical about believing anything's possible because it only provides superficial hope to an inherently hopeless entity?

Joe: More or less.

Avina: You blanked out on what I just said. I guess what I was saying is that believing in anything's possible is naïve.

Joe: I think so too. But not knowing such a belief is available is also naïve.

Avina: Why?

Joe: What if you need to fall back on that belief at some point? Rest on it while you regain confidence then toss it aside.

Avina: Beliefs are hardly accessories.

Joe: I think they are. Why shouldn't they be?

Avina: They're hard to jump in and out of. And they're too strong to purge just when you feel like it. And you can't purge them anyway because they metabolise and alter your make-up in doing so.

Joe: What make-up?

Avina: Your make-up. You.

Joe: Only the excess will be purged. The rest adds to the adventure of life.

Avina: You can't use optimism as an example of accessorizing with a belief. It is not a belief.

Joe: Why not?

Avina: Optimism can't be a belief.

Joe: Why not?

Avina: Maybe it can be.

Joe: You're guaranteed failure if you accessorize with beliefs.
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